Peanut Buttering

Canary in the saltmine

I was in an argument over chat today where I felt I was clearly in the right. The other person was being so stubborn in their stance and I found it extremely frustrating.

As I reflected afterward, I realized that in our entire chat, my opponent had spoken only in statements; not once had they asked a question. But neither had I.

And so I realized that I, too, had been stubborn. I think of myself as having a scout mindset—seeking not to "win" an argument, but rather to understand the other person's perspective so that together we might seek the truth and achieve the best possible outcome. But can you really say you are seeking to understand someone, if you do not ask them a single question?

This feels like a useful self-check.